so that wasnt chicken after all
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize
