She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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