Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Randomize
