I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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