Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
