it was like eating out sand paper
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
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