508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Randomize
