dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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