mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
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