If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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