Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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