I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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