he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize