I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
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