Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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