Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Randomize
