Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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