One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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