your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
