Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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