so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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