I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
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