I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
