I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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