Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.