Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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