would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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