i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
