actually, I'm a sock model
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
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