Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize