Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Randomize