I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize