I just cut my nipple shaving
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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