I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
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