yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Randomize
