I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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