White coat. Heels.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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