oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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