That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.