Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(614): View more from Ohio

Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?

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(515): View more from Iowa

I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.

(407): View more from Florida

Its part of my fall instant classic line.

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(905): View more from Toronto

My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.

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(807): View more from Ontario

I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.

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(802): View more from Vermont

I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.

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(973): View more from New Jersey

after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college

(973): View more from New Jersey

she has no idea

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(702): View more from Nevada

Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim

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(235): View more from

Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.

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(314): View more from Missouri

I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?

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