My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
