i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Randomize
