We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
