Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
pray to the hookup gods
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Randomize
