we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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