Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize