So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
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