last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
