Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
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Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
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Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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