were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize