Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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